Top 7 Lies We’ve Told Insurgents


From the firmbase

Number 7.
If you keep lying to me we’re going to tear this house apart.

Number 6.
Just tell us where Bob is and we’ll let you go.

Number 5.
I’ll pay big money for you to point out the IED maker.

Number 4.
If you take us to the rest of your weapons we’ll let you go.

Number 3.
Abu Ghraib is getting turned over to the Iraqis, and I think you know what that means…no more gentle treatment from the Americans.

Number 2.
Don’t worry. We’ll have him back in a day or two.

And the number one lie we’ve told an insurgent:
Bob (known associate of this insurgent) is a spy for the US military. Bob sent me here tonight to f#@k you up.

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May 6th, 2006
16 Responses
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Reader Comments

Comment Number:
1
Written by:
jdb0857
Posted on:
May 6, 2006 at 5:47 pm

Nice work. Good to know you are safe.

Be SAFE

Comment Number:
2
Written by:
A Military Mom
Posted on:
May 6, 2006 at 8:52 pm

Thanks for the insight.
Stay safe…keep your butt down and your head low.
My prayers go with you.

Comment Number:
3
Written by:
Mintz
Posted on:
May 6, 2006 at 9:14 pm

You should tell an insurgent one night:
“Tonight we Americans launched our final campaign. We have every terrorist leader. We won. Now tell me everything!”

Comment Number:
4
Written by:
Laura, Marine mom from Ohio
Posted on:
May 8, 2006 at 9:09 am

Keep staying one step ahead of the bad guy. Stay safe, my prayers are with you.

Comment Number:
5
Written by:
Donna, Los Osos, CA
Posted on:
May 8, 2006 at 1:33 pm

Take care Midnight. I guess it’s one of the few times we get license to lie..dealing with such as these. Praying for you and your guys. You all are wonderful!!

Semper gratus,
Donna

Comment Number:
6
Written by:
Chris
Posted on:
May 8, 2006 at 2:32 pm

I like number 3. Shows an adaptive use of current events.

Comment Number:
7
Written by:
Cobra
Posted on:
May 8, 2006 at 9:24 pm

I came across your site and am amazed that you havnt been shutdown, i guess thats that good thing about freedom of speech though. but honestly, how do you deal with the fact that you are most probobly killing innocent people???? sure , you could lie your ass of to them, but honestly, you could just as easily tell them the truth and they would die anyway. i have trouble seeing how people justify this war, and how we all blindly follow in the wake of this “”world Leader”" socalled, wathave we become?? killing random unfortunate people just because we have the guns and they have turbins and dark skin??? o yea and oil fields??? i support the troops, my heart and prayers go out to you, that you stay alive and keep safe, but i also have to question the motives of an overly corrupt government that is leading our finest into a “battle” that is waged just to keep the rich richer and the middlen class fighting the fucking bastards with stoneage RPGs and AKs.

Much Luck and may god go with you,
my regards to you and your fine friends,
keep ur heads down
an lay a few rounds down for me!

Comment Number:
8
Written by:
JE
Posted on:
May 9, 2006 at 8:36 am

“Let the Hero, born of woman, crush the serpent with His heel” - Battle Hymn of The Republic

Stay safe, Midnight

Comment Number:
9
Written by:
Chris
Posted on:
May 11, 2006 at 6:01 pm

I hope that you did not let the poster “Cobra” get to you. He is a lib loser. Most Americans support you. Keep up the good work. Kill lots of troublemakers. Come home safe.

I am trying to get your blogmaster (my cubicle neighbor) on the right path but with the video games and frisbee there seems to be little hope.

Comment Number:
10
Written by:
Slayer
Posted on:
May 11, 2006 at 7:41 pm

Right path? I didn’t take EA for a left winger… :)

LOL… Hey, don’t be hatin’ on disc golf though… I’m sure it’s a very popular sport… :) Actually, I went in to Hibbet Sports and they had quite a disc golf section, I was surprised.

BTW, Happy Birthday Midnight! A little early, but I saw it on myspace and I thought I would say so …before I forget.

MIDNIGHT’S BIRTHDAY IS THE 13th EVERYONE!

Comment Number:
11
Written by:
Jeff Barnett
Posted on:
May 12, 2006 at 2:02 pm

Don’t worry, I don’t let much bother me. He doesn’t have a flipping clue what I’ve done, especially relating to killing innocent people. At the end of the day I have to look at myself in the mirror. My conscience is at ease, and I am unconcerned about how armchair quarterbacks may judge me.

Comment Number:
12
Written by:
jmarken
Posted on:
May 12, 2006 at 10:39 pm

I’ve gotten behind on your posts. Saw this after sending a motomail to my nephew sgt USMC in Al Qa’im 3rd AABN who has said some similar things. I nearly butsted my guts laughing. You are too cool. Have you ever thought of making writing into a profession?:>)

Keep ‘em guessing and come home with all your parts the same way you left.
JohnM

Comment Number:
13
Written by:
Fuzzilicious Thinking
Posted on:
May 14, 2006 at 10:14 am

Weekend Funnies…

Top 7 Insurgent Lies and Top 7 Lies We’ve Told Insurgents…

Insurgent Lie #2

Why do you plant IEDs in the road?
“Because it damages the road and then the Americans fix it and make it better.”…

Comment Number:
14
Written by:
Argghhh! The Home Of Two Of Jonah's Military Guys..
Posted on:
May 14, 2006 at 11:58 am

H&I Fires* 14 May…

Open post for those with something to share, updated through the day. New, complete posts come in below this one. Note: If trackbacking, please acknowledge this post in your post. That’s only polite. You’re advertising here, we should get an……

Comment Number:
15
Written by:
The Sanity Inspector
Posted on:
May 14, 2006 at 10:34 pm

Funny stuff, thanks for posting it.

We sure do appreciate the job you’re doing. All of our futures depend on it, even those who oppose the war. Just git ‘er done, and then let the armchair qbs second-guess to their heart’s content.

Every day we don’t have a terrorist attack back here at home, is a day I’m grateful for all of your hard work.

Comment Number:
16
Written by:
Jennifer
Posted on:
May 16, 2006 at 1:40 am

Keep the faith, man.

I miss Iraq, in a freakin’ weird-assed way.

Stay as safe as you can, and if you can’t, make sure you take one hell of an honor guard with you.